I have a wildly candid conversation about that with this week’s guest, In the Valley Below. Jeff and Angela share deeply personal stories they’ve never shared in any interview before for fear their big label or even fans wouldn’t understand. After a trip to SXSW in Austin, Texas, they fell in love, Angela left her girlfriend and they decided they needed to write music together. The band started as a studio project, and as you’ll hear, nearly walked away from music. Then, after a crazy turn of events, they made their television debut on The Late Show With David Letterman and have since appeared on Conan and tons of music festivals. LA Weekly listed their debut album among the 10 Best Albums of 2014 and The Huffington Post named “Peaches,” the song you just heard, the #5 song of that same year.
Come to think of it, I don’t remember ever wondering what sex therapy was or who it’s for but after my conversation with somatic sex therapist, Elizabeth McGrath, I realized I could have saved a million sessions with my therapist and a lot of time and money if I just would have started with someone like her. Sure, there’s plenty of other non-sexually related issues you can chat with your Counsellor about like facing mortality, how your parents were total assholes, and your fear of meat but at least for me, most of my issues have had to do sex and relationships. If I would have spent time unraveling those, I would have known so much more of myself, so much faster and that would have leaf blown a million mental boxing matches. Just have a listen to this conversation with Elizabeth McGrath and you’ll see what we mean. We cover a massive range topics and really helpful advice that will, no doubt, lead you to the same conclusion I had: Sex-therapy is the new must have.
There are two kinds of people: those of us that are domesticated and those that feel strangely out of place. The ones that feel out of place, might not be able to communicate why, but know in their gut not only that our world is toxic but that the systems and traditions we’ve created don’t feel even close to natural. No matter which camp you fall in, both feel depressed, frustrated, anxious and flat-out unsatisfied as they get dragged through our culture’s unfriendly demands just to stay afloat. Have you ever asked yourself how and why we’ve sabotaged ourselves like this? Author and Psychologist Chris Ryan, has tackled big parts of the Matrix through his and his wife’s book, Sex at Dawn, his podcast Tangentially Speaking and his forthcoming book Civilized to Death.
There’s certain people you just can’t put a finger on. And those are perhaps my FAVORITE people. They’re uncategorizable astral projections, they’re so unique it feels like they almost have no derivative. Amazing Race winner, Tyler MacNiven is one of those people. Besides being a complete blast, he’s overflowing with life— he's so happy, so positive-- all the time— that it you wonder if he’s really like that. (He is.) He’s just a programmed happy person.
Hard to believe it, but Dave and I have worked together for over 10 years. When I joined Jive there were just 13-14 people but he had been there from day one. It was him, and two developers. We sat in the same office for most of the ride of what ended up becoming rocket ship until just before the company went public. After that, Dave gave me the confidence and coaching to launch my own company and worked with me as a Board member for 5 years. This episode will resonate with any of you who’ve had to remodel yourself. That have had to navigate that scary void between an old identity and a new one. Who’ve had to ease your old self out of the equation so you could truly become someone completely different.